When someone mentions “drama” in the workplace, it’s easy to imagine petty conflicts, office gossip or exaggerated reactions to minor issues. But here’s the thing: life - and reactions - are subjective, and personal. And they can impact not just life outside of work, but how people actually work.

What might feel like unnecessary drama to one person could be a real, deeply felt issue to someone else. For managers (and co-workers), it’s critical to pause and consider the root cause before dismissing it outright. In the below video, I roleplay HR explaining how to do that as a manager. And in this blog, I give specific examples of how you can approach the topics I talk about.



Why Some Issues Feel Like "Drama" - But Are More Than That

To a manager trying to juggle deadlines, team performance and strategic goals, a team member’s concerns might seem like a distraction from the bigger picture. But often, these concerns are tied to real impacts on their lives. Here are a few reasons why an issue might carry more weight for your team:

• It Affects Their Livelihood: Changes in work schedules, team dynamics or policies can ripple beyond the office. For example, a shift in responsibilities might impact how someone balances caregiving responsibilities or affects their financial stability.
• It Feels Personal: Feedback, especially when poorly delivered, can feel like a critique of someone’s work ethic, skills or value. When people believe their basic contributions are questioned, it can trigger defensiveness or anxiety.
• It Challenges Stability: External events - like political news or the economy - can make employees feel uncertain about their job security. This uncertainty often surfaces as heightened sensitivity to smaller workplace issues.

Real-Life Examples of “Drama” and How to Respond

Let’s break down a few real-world scenarios (that I mention in the video) and how managers can approach them productively:

• U.S. Politics: You’re excited about the inauguration of a new president, but a team member is worried about an Executive Order that could impact their family’s immigration status.
  
  • Why It Feels Like Drama: To you, this might seem like a personal concern unrelated to work.
  • Why It’s Not: The EO could directly affect their sense of security and ability to focus at work, making it a legitimate concern.
  • Your Response: You can show empathy even if you don’t fully share or understand their perspective. Consider reaching out to HR with a question like, “Some of my team members are upset about recent Executive Orders. How can I support them on a personal level while maintaining my role as their manager?” This demonstrates care for your team, acknowledges their concerns, and opens the door to actionable guidance.
• TikTok Ban Uncertainty: Your team member was in chaos over news of a potential TikTok ban, as they rely heavily on the platform for personal use and even professional development.
  • Why It Feels Like Drama: To some managers, this might seem like an overreaction to something that hasn’t even happened yet.
  • Why It’s Not: For employees who use TikTok for professional growth or networking, the ban could feel like a loss of a valuable resource, impacting their career development or sense of connection. 
  • Your Response: Show understanding and support by saying something like, “I get that this news might be throwing you off, especially if TikTok has been a big part of how you learn or grow professionally. Let’s chat about other ways you can keep building those skills or staying connected.” Even when the "ban" seemed to last a short time (but with an uncertain future), work together to brainstorm tools or resources. Social media is a source of entertainment, but also a place many find accessible learning and development. Personally, I'm a LinkedIn Learning instructor - many can get access through their organization or a LinkedIn Premium membership, but did you know you can get free (limited) access through your library card? Check it out here, and share with your teams. I have several courses on leadership and AI on the platform. 
• Supplier Issues: A production delay from a key supplier leads to tension between departments, with each blaming the other for not preparing adequately.
  • Why It Feels Like Drama: To leadership, this might appear as finger-pointing rather than focusing on solutions.
  • Why It’s Not: Delays could jeopardize delivery timelines, client relationships and revenue, making it a high-stakes issue for everyone involved.
  • Your Response: Department-versus-department, or company-versus-company, mindsets are common, but not productive. Leadership can mean taking a holistic approach and relating to everyone involved as humans. Step in to facilitate a solution-focused discussion. For example, some words to your team could be, “Sometimes things are out of our control, but we can always try to get to the bottom of it. Let’s see how we can reach out and find out what's going on, and how we can productively both address the immediate challenge and how we can try to prevent it in the future.” 

How to Differentiate "Drama" from Real Issues

As a manager, your job isn’t to question whether someone’s emotions are valid, but to uncover the root of their concerns and respond in a constructive way. Here’s how:

• Ask Questions: Before labeling something as "drama," dig deeper. “What about this situation concerns you most?” or “How is this affecting your work or well-being?” can reveal important context.
• Consider the Impact: Even if the issue seems minor to you, think about how it might affect the employee’s day-to-day life. Is it causing undue stress? Is it linked to a larger, unresolved problem?
• Separate Tone from Substance: Sometimes, the way an issue is raised can feel dramatic, but the core concern is valid. Understand that everyone hasn't gotten the training you have (even if that's just reading blogs like this on communication at work!). You can always talk to your team about how to most productively raise concerns. But when they're doing it, especially for the first time, it can help to focus on the substance, not the delivery.

Why Dismissing “Drama” Can Backfire

When managers dismiss employee concerns as “drama,” it can lead to unintended consequences. You may do that because you want your team to focus on work. But when you ignore their real concerns or emotions, employees may feel overlooked or undervalued, which can result in disengagement, frustration and eventually, higher turnover. A small issue that’s ignored can easily grow into a larger problem simply because it wasn’t addressed early on.

On the other hand, taking concerns seriously – even ones that seem minor – creates trust and shows empathy. When employees know you’re open to listening without judgment, they’ll feel more comfortable bringing real issues (and even good ideas) to you.

Practical Tips for Managers

• Pause Before Reacting: When faced with a situation that feels dramatic, take a moment to collect your thoughts and approach the conversation calmly.
• Acknowledge Their Feelings: Sometimes, simply saying, “I can see why this feels important to you” can defuse tension and open the door to a productive dialogue. Just like giving grace for their tone can matter, showing grace with yours can, too.
• Focus on Solutions: For work issues, shift the conversation from venting to action. Ask, “What do you think we can do to improve this situation?”
• Recognize Patterns: If similar issues keep surfacing, it’s worth considering whether there’s a systemic problem at play.
• Follow Up: After addressing the issue, check in later to ensure the resolution is working and the employee feels supported.

Final Thought: Perception Shapes Reality

What you might see as “drama” is often a reflection of someone’s reality. Their concerns might tie directly to their sense of stability, value or ability to be productive at work. By taking a moment to pause, consider their perspective and act with empathy, you’re not just managing “drama” - you’re building trust, respect and a stronger team.

Training Managers

Does this resonate? If you're in HR, it might be a message your managers need to hear. Manager training isn’t just about checking a box - it’s about equipping leaders with the tools to make a real impact. Drawing from my background in legal and HR, I’ve developed solutions that blend practical, on-demand training with resources designed to make it easy for organizations to facilitate live, customized follow-up sessions. These programs not only help managers build their skills, but also give you a framework to reinforce those lessons, creating long-term results. Ready to take your team’s leadership development to the next level? Explore our organizational training options and set up an exploratory call here.